On my Facebook page I asked: What weighs you down or annoys you? (because sometimes it’s just good to vent!) and boy did you all have a lot to say! If you have followed me for a while, you know I’m all about being positive, so I wanted to share your responses here, and offer some strategies for building your inner strength. Hearing what others are struggling with, or just annoyed by, can help you feel a sense of community. We all have struggles, ups and downs and those pesky things that just grate on our nerves. You aren’t the only one. The simple act of knowing it isn’t just you can help build your resilience. And just like you build up muscle strength in your body, you can build up your inner strength. All you need is a little focus and a few techniques. But first, let’s take a look at what everyone said is weighing them down:
People who text and drive
Exercising and eating right and nothing happens
Not being appreciated
Selfish people – People who only call when they need something.
Lack of employment
Lack of energy
People who don’t respect the Earth
Excess belly fat
Coworkers who do too much personal stuff at work
Lack of empathy
People who don’t RSVP to invites
Spouses who won’t work out with you
Lack of accountability
TV news that’s overly dramatic for ratings
Caring for an aging parent when other siblings don’t help
Injury Health problems
Stuck on a weight loss plateau
People who text while you are spending time with them
Poor customer service
Having to listen to other people’s phone conversations
Lack of motivation
Not seeing fitness results
Losing and gaining the same five pounds
You probably feel a little blue after reading that list, so let’s move on to the positive! So… what can you do to get on top of what’s pushing you down? Here are some strategies you can deploy.
Have some power phrases. When you don’t want to do something, you might temporarily have the mental state of a defiant child (“I don’t want to do this!”), but when you pull out one of your power phrases like, “Pull up your big girl boots,” you dive in and take action. It’s a reminder to take the emotion out of it and just do what you need to do… like a big girl. Come up with a power phrase that works for you. Here are some others: Yes You Can. I’ve got this. What doesn’t kill me, makes me stronger. So, if you find yourself wanting to skip a workout, or having to deal with a negative person, just use one of your power phrases in your mind to center yourself and take positive action. Little phrases can remind you that you are strong. You are, you know. (Most people are stronger than they think!)
Control what you can control. Lots of what gets people down has to do with the behavior of others. And you just can’t control what other people say and do. Letting go of what others say and do can be hard, but the better you get at not letting the words and actions of others impact your mood or state, the happier you will be. In every situation you can ask yourself: What can I control and what can I change? You may not be able to control rude, negative or selfish people, but you can control whether you choose to be around such people. You can control your reaction and how you spend your time. Decide not to let the negativity of others puncture your nice happy bubble. Not always easy, but always rewarding.
Teach people how to treat you. This one ties into the last strategy, but you set the boundaries in your life. Are you making it clear to people how you expect to be treated? Do you say “No” when you want to? Do you decide to spend less time with people who bring you down? Do you authentically express your emotions? If someone close to you hurts your feelings, do you say something or do you sit and stew? Don’t expect people to figure out how you are feeling, just repeatedly communicate and show people how you expect to be treated. BONUS: It will build your self-confidence too.
Work your own success plan. What are you doing that’s working in your life? Do more of that. Are you doing things that are hindering your progress? Stop doing those things. What can propel you forward? Make a list and start doing those things. Daily. You may be saying, “Duh” because this sounds so simple, but you’d be surprised how many people keep things status quo because they don’t take the time to assess what’s working, what isn’t and what they could do to hurl themselves toward their goals. Try it today!
Say goodbye to your plateau. Since so many of you expressed frustration in being stuck at a particular weight due to a lack of motivation or doing all the right things but still not seeing progress, here are my tips for saying “So Long” to your plateau. Remember, before you throw in your workout towel, realize that most people hit a plateau at some point. Best advice? Before you give up, change it up (change your exercise, your intensity, the duration, watch your portions, eat clean … click here for the rest of your go-to plan to get off your plateau!) When you see results, your belief in yourself will soar.
Plug in to gratitude. Oh, no you might be thinking … not that gratitude word again. Yup. Gratitude can help build your inner strength because you are taking time to notice all of those positives in your life. You pause to make sure you aren’t taking all of your life gifts for granted. Don’t miss the little things like the cup of coffee you enjoy in the morning or the sun shining on your face. And maybe you even take a moment to recall the times you have persevered through adversity and remind yourself you are strong. Give the great aspects of your life the credit they deserve by marinating your mind in them for a while. So eat healthy, work your body and build up your inner resilience. You will create an attitude that’s empowering. You’ve got this! P.S. Share your best resilience tip in the comments section! And if you know someone who could use a little inspiration or if you need regular motivation, make sure you are on my Get Healthy U newsletter list!